Mom-isms

“Don’t ask me why the answer is NO”. I got this one some ten minutes back.

Man, I don’t believe it, I’m gonna be 23 next year and I still call her up for the chindiest of things in my life. The one above is one of my favorite mom-isms….cuz I know when she says this she means that I’ve irritated her to a level where she’s pretending to be radical, rational and show that she can handle one more idiotic-n-whimsical fancies of her daughters by sheer pressure with a very motherly do-this-or-you-are-gone stare and I also know that if raise my voice by 0.5 decibel, I’m dead meat.

Some more favorites of mine in the same category that I’ve been hearing since I realized I could listen:

1. You're the oldest. You should know better.
2. Your father is going to hear about this when HE gets home!
3. You just ate an hour ago!
4. Why? Because I SAID so, that's why!
5. Now, say you're sorry...and MEAN it!
6. Go to your room and think about what you did!
7. Going to a party? Leave a phone number in case I need to call.
8. How do you know you don't like it if you haven't tasted it?
9. I don't care what "everyone" is doing. I care what YOU are doing!
10. You won't be happy until you break that, will you?
11. Enough is enough!
12. When I was your age...

This is to all my friends below the age 12..my little brother Manu, cousins Nehal, Devan, Mansi, Raghav, Aryan, Keshav, Gaurish, Ravish……. Next time your mom uses some of the above, ask her to be original.

With love,

Parul Jiji.

“Silly shrewd pointless nothings”

That’s what Gaurav called us, MBAs. Understood. When you are in your final year of engineering, you tend to say such things to your friends in final year of management education. He wasn’t entirely wrong.

Last night I was up till three for some stupid report because I was busy all week. Busy in trying to take away the priceless movie marathon crown from the fierce violently aggressive competitors called roommates.

So, coming back to the report… Did I say I was working?

Dhanya would say, ‘Yeah…right’

I was netWorking! And multitasking too!! Networking on G-talk contemporaneous with networking on orkut! But I needn’t renounce G-talk, curtail my visits or orkut or abnegate myself from reading and writing blogs so soon….specially after asking a friend, working for a bank who is also a product of management education about his dormant blog. His reply was, “all you wanna do is bitch about bosses and sick sales target-obsessed attitudes whereas we are kids of faff-rich wombs…. So it is better to nurture a dead blog rather than pouring your heart out on it and get kicked out the next day!”

Hence, celibacy for me shall start when I’m earning …Money you see is like exam forms….you need them but don’t wanna work for them.

I have this silly habit of digressing from the topic. Where was I? Yeah, Gaurav.

“Gaurav, what else do you do apart from scoffing derisively at managers, ridiculing management institutions and ludicrously jeer at MBAs?”

“I prepare for CAT”.

Well well my love, come along, we are waiting.