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The meek shall inherit the earth after i'm done with it! I was a bored Brahmin bschooler who ended up marrying another one :) and now here we are enjoying the natural progressions of life....traffic, inlaws, bosses, kid, electricians, plumbers and money matters.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Hi Mom, will you for once listen to me?

At the core, I am a non-listener. I listen till the topic of discussion isn’t leading to infringement of my basic fundamental rights. That is why, listening to mom is a slight hitch. Firstly, she still thinks I am incapable of making right decisions, venture out in the open all alone, open the door without being advised by her to do so, stand straight without her instructions like I were still a 2 year old (I can see Chotu and Manu nodding in agreement in Jaipur.."arre yeh toh hamare saath bhee hota hai.."). Secondly, we would always topple upon something where she would succeed in coercing me into changing the way things have been (read – encroach my personal space).
Her propositions are detailed and demanding and need a paper and pen to start with. Plus if you follow them, you’ll feel 84 by the time you are 32.

One can’t possibly eat everything she suggests as breakfast in one light year (Shaktiman can go to the moon and come back and I’ll still be having breakfast) ….milk, fruits, muesli, yogurt….. (if you are staying alone, like I am, she’ll fill you in with timesaving techniques like: while you cutting fruits, you can boil the oats)

I don’t think I’ll have time to sleep or shit or earn if I follow the lifestyle she suggests "…take a while in making your bed, 20 mins kapalbhaati, 20 mins pranayam, 20 mins walk early morning, evenings should start with 20 mins of….. "

And I don’t think I’ll have any social life left if I listen to her all the time as: One, I’d have no time on my hands after breakfast! Two, she insists on calling ALL my friends home, ALL the time because ‘…kya fayda hai bahaar jaane ka..tum log 150 rupaye ki coffee peete ho….’. And three, without trying to show how curious she is, she’ll try to know all about your personal life… ‘Chotu toh keh rahi thi tu pichle weekend ghar pe nahi thi, maine bola office mein kaam hoga..’

At my age, if you can cook, earn, keep a clean house, wash clothes and also have a personal life, you gotta be a super girl. To my understanding, I am one. But mumma dear refuses to recognize my talents and recommends something or the other which to her understanding will take me one step closer to her picture of a perfect 23 year old indian marriageable spinster. I end up listening to her because otherwise, people at home have to face repercussions..... Papa would be wincing at the sight of green healthy – gheeless food, Manu would squirm at the sudden cut-down on hours to be at play and Chotu would cringe at the questioning looks given to her while she’s on her cellphone. All three would blame me as if i were the mastermind behind the plot leading to their miseries. Very submissively I would agree and apologize and do something I hate doing – Obey!!

Mummy darling, please find below the proof (today’s breakfast):

I hope you and the world around you is slightly happy now.

Now I guess, shewill agree, I’m the world’s best daughter and trust me with other decisions I am planning to make in the near future :)


Fuzzy, the Ducky said...

Reminds me of 2 songs-
"Hey Maama, muje hain kehna" (Old song) I don't think you would have heard it

and of course "Tuje sab hain pata hain na maa" Taare Zameen Par

Nice pic - and was the ET for your mom as well? ;)

chini said...

very well written
i suppose all mum are like this .